Working On Routine

Routine is the secret to success for me. I know it. I have proven it. I have lived it.

But it's so hard to put into practice.

I want to write every day again. I want to wake up and run most days. I want to feel limber and relaxed again. I want to remember calm, instead of trying to create it all the time. And I desperately want to see the progress I was making renewed.

So, my routine must return. But everytime I make a deadline for the day it has to be reenacted, I find some excuse to put it off another day. And another. And another.

Because tomorrow is a day that never comes. Saying "I'll do it tomorrow." is as good as saying "I don't want to do it at all."

The fact is, I want to see that beautiful progress I was making, but I don't want to put in the effort the routine costs. Which is funny, because it didn't feel like much effort while it was happening. At least, not until I added a whole bunch more to my routine.

But it's time to get off my butt and start this life change back up again. I'm tired of excuses and silly self-pity. I want to feel myself living again!

Here's hoping I can survive the ride.

Going Forward

So, I failed. And today was just as hard as the days before. So what? I'm not doing those days over again, I'm starting a whole new day each and every morning I'm alive.

There's no point in staring at the past. The past is unchanging. We can glimpse back at it every once in a while and enjoy the stories, but we can't get lost in it. Because that's not the direction we're heading. We're going forward.

And forward means progress. Forward means change. Change of scenery, change of direction, change of heart. All of this is what lies ahead, not behind.

I guess I need to keep my eyes glued to the horizon, then. Because tomorrow is a whole new day of opportunity!

What's Wrong?

I may be a good writer now. But I'm not great. And I desperately need to be great. I believe my key to greatness is criticism.

If I want to grow, I'm going to have to ruthlessly work on the things I'm bad at. I've been tackling the consistency problem I've had, but it's time to identify other weaknesses in my writing and start targeting those behaviors, too. Only by identifying them and working through them can I hope to get better.

I know I can do it. For once in my life, I finally view criticism as a good thing, instead of a self-esteem bashing. I have to use it to grow, instead of viewing it as some kind of proof that I'm not good enough as I am. That's my path to greatness.

So, if any of you readers out there can identify where I need improvement, I'd dearly appreciate it. I'd also appreciate it if you know of any sites where I can join and have my work critiqued by other writers. I'd like to start working on my writing in full force now.

I'm going to need YOUR help to do it.

Daily Stats:

 

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today.
2. Wrote in my journal, stayed on budget, did not write a poem today.
3. Posted on my blog.
4. Made my bed.
5. Stayed on my diet.
6. Cooked my lunch and breakfast and dinner.
7. Drew.

My Superpower

I was thinking to myself on the way to the hospital to see my mom and I realized something. I have an incredible superpower.

Unfortunately, it isn't something cool like telekinesis or technopathy.

I have the amazing ability to create worlds and characters and stories in my head. I can go anywhere I want to, just by thinking about it. I can feel any emotion I want to, have any relationship I want to, be any person I want to, just by imagining it. I'm incredibly creative, and my brain never stops wanting to create something else. It churns out ideas at an unrealistic rate.

But I don't do anything with it.

I spend most of my time inside my imagination, creating and pretending and building inside my mind where it does no one, not even me, any kind of good. I read books and watch TV in a strange attempt to direct my imagination so it doesn't go directions I don't want it to. And then I do puzzles and play games so that my brain's too busy to create, just to turn it off for a while.

But I never use my gift, my superpower, to benefit. I've tried writing, tried to make it direct my imagination in a constructive fashion. And I fell head over heals in love with the method. I found that writing opened up my imagination in ways I never dreamed. And it directed my focus, so that my mind didn't wander.

But then I grow bored. I want to move onto something else. And the book is never finished.

When I started the series I'm currently working on, I determined that wasn't going to happen this time. And it hasn't. It's been around 2-3 years since I first started designing this novel and I haven't allowed myself to get distracted yet.

I've decided, though, that the only way I'm ever going to see my superpower benefit myself and others, is if I direct it towards my goals mercilessly. I can't allow myself to imagine and create whenever and wherever I want. I need control.

Control is one of the few things I don't find easy to create.

Small periods of control are easy. It's the long-term that I can't seem to manage. But this new life change is all about changing that. Shaping my mind and my life the way I want them to be.

So that's my next concentration. I'm going to continue on with my goals (drawing daily is my next goal and it starts on 4/25), but I'm going to do so with an overall thought in mind: I want the ability to turn my superpower on and off at will.

I refuse to let it rule my life. It's time for me to take control.

Daily Stats:

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today.
2. Wrote in my journal, stayed on budget, and wrote a poem today.
3. Posted on my blog.
4. Made my bed and did some laundry.
5. Kept to my diet.
6. Made pizza and lots of vegetables and fruits for lunch.

Determined To Succeed

I finished reading Talent Is Overrated today. It was truly a great book. And I think I am the richer for having read it.

One point has really stuck with me, though. It was on the last few pages of the book, just about at the end, when the author said that many people who have achieved great things have little to no social life and very few hobbies. The author points out that it takes great determination and need to be willing to forgo relationships and fun to achieve your dreams. He even goes on to question how big something would have to be to make you feel the same way.

And I asked myself that question today. Over and over again, I asked it. I've long held the dream of having it all. I wanted to live my dream life, have my dream career, and have a family. And I wanted to be GREAT at it all.

But I'm not Superwoman. I can't do everything. I'm going to have to make some choices. And it all comes back to what I want more than anything from my life. The answer to that question didn't take but a moment for me to think up.

I want to be a writer.

And not just any writer. I want to be a world-reknowned author. I want to be one of the greatest writers to have ever lived. I want to share my worlds, my characters, my stories with generations of people. I want it so bad that it actually hurts.

If push comes to shove, I'm willing to forgo a social life and hobbies to achieve this dream. This dream is more important to me than pretty much anything else.

And I will succeed. There isn't another option anymore.

Daily Stats:

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today.
2. Wrote in my journal, stayed on budget, and wrote a poem today.
3. Posted on my blog.
4. Made my bed.
5. Stayed on my diet. :D
6. Cooked my lunch and dinner, and fixed the rest.

Write It Down (And Then Do It)

Is there anything you want to accomplish with your life? With this year? With this week? Today? This minute?

Then stop what you're doing. Go on. Take your eyes off the computer screen and get a notebook out.

Done that? Now write down what you want to do with your time. Write down, in detail, a specific goal you want to accomplish. Finished yet? Then give yourself a time limit to accomplish that goal.

Having a day and time that you have to achieve that goal makes it suddenly much scarier, doesn't it? I've found both in my writing and in real life planning, everything becomes more real if you write it down and plan it out. And real is a heck of a lot more terrifying than fantasy.

But real is what you live. Real is possible. Fantasy is just a hazy wish you dream about before you go to sleep at night. If you ever want your life to become that dream, you're going to have to make it real.

Is that enough, however? Can you just give yourself a general goal and a deadline and voila, you're a success? Of course not!

You're going to have to plan. A lot.

Take that general goal and break it down into many, smaller goals. Once you've finished that, give yourself a mini-deadline for each of your small goals. Be conservative; it's better to have too much time allotted than not enough in this exercise.

Now look at your coming schedule. What time do you have available for this activity? How can you fit your goal pursuits into your daily life? Obviously you're going to have to give up something to make your goal happen. Because if you didn't have your time wasted on something else, you'd already have accomplished the goal by now.

So do an honest evaluation of your life. Is there something you could cut back on, just a bit, to fit your new activities in? Is there anything you can cut completely?

Write down any decisions you make about your decisions here, too. The human brain is a funny thing. Writing your goals and decisions down on paper has shown to make people more susceptible to implementing those changes.

Having said that, I don't want any of you to mistake my meaning. Once you write it down, you're still going to have to do it. You have to get up and walk away from the pen and paper and actually accomplish something if you want to succeed at your goals. But writing them down is an excellent strategy at changing the way you think about those changes. It takes something that seems like a fantasy and brings it into reality.

And no one knows how incredibly hard that is to do better than a writer.

Daily Stats:

 

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today.
2. Wrote in my journal, stayed on budget, and wrote a poem today.
3. Posted on my blog.
4. Made my bed.
5. Stayed on diet (improved my vegetable and fruit eating!).
6. Cooked breakfast, fixed my lunch, and fixed myself dinner.

Research Your Way To Success

Up until 2 months ago, I always believed it was impossible for me to succeed. I just couldn't see how I could get from where I was to where I wanted to be. It seemed insurmountable.

And then I reached the point where I was sick of giving myself excuses.

My brain ran through my various failures over the years, looking at what I'd tried and failed to do. And I didn't want to do the same old thing, hoping it would work this time. It hadn't worked before and it wouldn't work now. There had to be a better way.

So I googled it.

Sounds so simple, right? Well, it wasn't. I filtered through tons of websites, all claiming to have thousands of ways to fix my motivational problems. Instead of picking through them higgledy-piggledy, I clicked on the ones sourced in psychological studies.

Eureka! I found my answers. They had been at my fingertips all along, yet I didn't have the where-with-all to find them.

And my life change was born. What you see here, on this blog, is an accumulation of weeks of research. I read books, I looked up website after website, and I studied each subject individually. Whatever I had to do to be successful this time, I was going to do it.

And here I am. Maybe not a raging success (yet!) but I've made it further than I've ever made it before. And my instincts tell me this is going to stick. This is a permanent change this time. All because I sat down and researched it.

Is there something you wish to change, too? Well, chances are there is an article or site dedicated to the subject somewhere on the internet. Google it and you may find that research will open the way to success for you, too. If it works for me (and many others who have succeeded at changing), chances are it will work for you.

If you really want it to.

Daily Stats:

 

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on writing twice today. Jogging day #1 for the week.
2. Wrote in my journal, kept to my budget, and wrote a poem today.
3. Posted on my blog.
4. Made my bed, picked up in my room, did some laundry, and did dishes.
5. Did NOT stay on my diet today.
6. Cooked nothing, but I did fix my breakfast.

10 Ways to Meditate

I remember when I first started meditating. It was only a little over 2 months ago, so it isn't hard, but it feels like forever ago. I remember feeling as though I was attempting something foreign and completely unknown.

I told myself it would be easy. I mean, how hard could sitting still and thinking about nothing but breathing be?

Turns out, pretty hard.

In fact, I've never grown to like that particular meditation. But I quickly discovered there are many other meditations out there to try. Here's just a few to peak your interest:

1.) Body scan meditation.

This one is my favorite. I lay still with my eyes closed and simply concentrate on one body part at a time. I repeat phrases like "I am my feet (or whatever body part I'm concentrating on)." and explore the sensations there until I can feel everything there without having to try. Then I move on to the next part it's connected to.

I start at my feet and move my way up until I reach my head. Each part is given special attention and any thoughts that intrude are brushed away and my concentration returns to my immediate concern. At the end, I concentrate on feeling my body in its entirety, and see how it feels to inhabit my own skin in the present moment.

What I love about this meditation is how incredibly relaxing it is. Because you concentrate on each body part without judging, it relaxes automatically without any interference from your mind.

2.) Walking meditation.

You can do this meditation anywhere really. Just get up and walk. Think the word inhale as you inhale, then count how many steps it takes for you to exhale. Repeat this over and over again as you walk.

I was amazed by how helpful this was at work. It's more of a mini-meditation for me, as I use it at my job to break up the stress of the day, but you can use it as a larger meditation if you like long walks in the wilderness or the like. It really helps you deal with hard days.

3.) Observational meditation.

This one is a little harder to do than the others, so you may want to try something else first. But it's relatively simple in theory. You simply count 6 exhales, and then start watching your thoughts. Label each thought with a name. Then make each thought as vivid as possible, picturing the thought as a living thing outside your body. Watch it for a while and then decide if you want to keep this thought or not. If you decide it is doing you harm, picture yourself pushing it away from yourself, building a wall between you and it, or simply deleting it from existence. Whatever imagery works for you, get rid of the thought.

You may have to brush the thought aside multiple times at first. But eventually your control will improve and the push will come easier.

What's incredible about this meditation is how it allows you to control your thoughts much deeper in real life than you ever thought possible. Once your brain has been trained to get rid of thoughts you don't want to have, the means of doing so is surprisingly easy.

4.) Emotional exploration meditation.

This is the same as the previous exercise, except this time you should observe your emotions instead of your thoughts. Whether you believe that each thought provokes an emotion or that each emotion provokes a thought, this exercise will help you control and identify your emotions.

Count 6 exhales before you start. Then go into your thoughts, merely observing. Don't get too caught up in the thoughts, just watch them as they go. Now, go deeper and find your emotions behind the thoughts. Go through and label the emotions you are feeling, one by one. Identify where they come from and explore what each feels like in its entirety, without judgment or fear of reprisal. Don't try to brush emotions aside as you did the thoughts, but do control what thoughts spring from these emotions. Reject any thoughts you don't like, and throw yourself into the emotion as much as you can without actually feeling it.

A great accompaniment to this meditation is to be extra-conscious of your emotions throughout your day. Take time to label thoughts throughout your day with an emotion and take time to have periodic checks to see what you are feeling right then, in that moment.

This is great for those of us who are extra sensitive (like me!). It helps you see how your emotions work and what the process is that you're going through. Controlling your reactions to emotions, and embracing them for what they are, are the first steps to being free from the power they hold over you.

5.) Cleaning meditation.

If you're one of those people who simply doesn't have the time to just sit still and do nothing, then this meditation is for you! Just go about a normal daily chore, but do it with one slight difference: instead of trying to finish the chore quickly to move on, absorb yourself completely with the physicality of it. Feel the washcloth as it washes the dishes. Feel every moment as it happens, dismissing any thoughts of what you have to do later or what happened last night at your friend's party. Just feel the moment right now.

This one is pretty simple and can have as meaningful an effect on your life as though you did carve out the time to meditate each day!

6.) Mantra meditation.

This is the one most of us see in the movies. In this meditation, you sit still and chant a mantra over and over again. It doesn't have to be out loud, but it does need to be simple and meaningful to you. Many people choose the word omm, for it's traditional purposes, but you can repeat any phrase or sound that appeals to you to repeat.

A great part of this meditation is repeating a positive affirmation in it. It's funny how much your brain begins to believe something if you say it enough times. So, you can kill two birds with one stone with this meditation and increase your positive thinking, too!

7.) Compassion meditation.

I've never tried this one myself, as I feel I suffer from too much compassion at the moment, but I feel it will definitely be added to my repertoir at some point in the future. There are several different kinds of compassion meditations, but here's the one I liked the most:

First, you call to mind your own self and say silently “May I be happy, may I be peaceful, may I be healthy, may I be free.” Next, call to mind someone you love, and say the same, but replace the Is with yous, obviously. Next, call to mind someone who is pissing you off or making you sad, and do it for them. From there, you can extend this meditation out to the entire world (“may all beings everywhere be happy” etc.). This part loses some people. If you’re one of them, then when you’re done with the person who you’re upset with, do someone else you love so you end on a good note.

This meditation is said to give people a more understanding and compassionate outlook on life and the people they deal with each day. It can definitely be a useful exercise when you're angry with one of your loved ones, or just upset in general.

8.) 100 Breaths meditation.

Okay, so this is just the breathing meditation we talked about not having to do, right? Except it isn't. In this meditation, you count each breath (that is, an inhale AND an exhale) until you reach the number 100. It sounds a LOT easier than it is because it's so simple to lose count due to thoughts coming along and distracting you from the numbers.

This is a great exercise if you want to learn how to control your concentration and focus for long periods of time. I hate it, myself, but I think it benefits my mind and so I stretch it with a few applications of it regularly.

9.) Focus meditation.

In this meditation, you sit and focus intently on an object outside of yourself. So, instead of observing your thoughts or feelings, you observe an object. Very popular objects to observe are flames and water.

This is a great meditation to stretch your focus. It keeps you thinking on something monotonous and mundane rather than the constant flow of life we get so used to.

10.) Spiritual meditation.

Meditation doesn't have to be spiritual, but it can be. You can experience it in the form of prayer if you so desire. Just pray as usual and concentrate on your words.


Meditation isn't always easy, but everyone can do it. It just takes practice and determination. And don't worry if your thoughts don't stay where you want them. Most people's don't. Even very experienced meditators suffer from that problem. Just remember that it's better to spend 10 minutes of your time redirecting your thoughts than it is allowing them to do whatever they want when you aren't looking.

Well, that's all the motivational speaking I have in me tonight. Good luck to everyone on learning meditation. I hope it proves as incredible an experience for you as it has been for me!

Daily Stats:

 

1. Stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today, but only exercised tonight.
2. Wrote in my journal, kept to my budget, and wrote a poem today.
3. Posted on my blog.
4. Made my bed.
5. Stayed on my diet.
6. Made my lunch. 

10 Reasons to Meditate

Are you interested in meditation? I've found it is the most useful technique in dealing with your problems, and even in discovering problems you never even realized you had.

Here's why I think you should try it:

1.) Meditation reduces stress.

Meditation has been shown in scientific studies to reduce our reactions to stress. And who doesn't have a stressful life, nowadays? If you ever feel a little overwhelmed by work, family, and your goals, meditation is a great way to unwind and get back on track.

2.) Meditation is good for your mental health.

I've found that my meditation has helped me explore reaches of my mind I didn't even know existed. By sitting and observing my thoughts, making them as vivid and detailed as possible so I can truly see all sides of them, I've found a lot of the problems I've had in pursuing my dreams were really all in my head.

And simply by dealing with those mental issues, I've been able to grow past them and pursue my dreams.

3.) Meditation can improve your physical health.

Meditation will improve your health by strengthening your immune system, reducing your blood pressure and lowering cholesterol levels.

If you're someone like me, who comes from a family of "sickies", this can be a life-saver. I also have extremely difficult health issues and meditation has been proven to reduce inflammation - a problem I have troubles with in my psoriasis and lupus.

4.) Meditation improves your sleep.

It's been shown that meditation can actually improve your insomnia and help you feel more rested after sleeping. However, in scientific studies, it has also been shown to make you a lighter sleeper, as the mind is more active.

5.) Meditation can slow aging.

Studies into the effects of meditation have shown that the regular practice of meditation can slow the aging process. The biological age of long term meditators is thought to be less than those of people who have never meditated. They think this is caused by the fact that meditation helps to reduce the body’s production of free radicals. Free radicals are organic molecules that are responsible for aging, tissue damage, and possibly some diseases.

Do you want to stay younger for a longer period of time? Then meditation is for you!


6.) Meditation promotes positive thinking.

You may think this is just an extension of good mental health, but I think this deserves a number all its own. Because how many negative thoughts have you had today? A hundred? A thousand? More? Did you get angry at someone in traffic? Frustrated with a coworker? Complain about your job (again)? Upset with your spouse or child? Now, track how many negative thoughts you had over the course of these emotions...

If you're anything like most people, you've had a lot of negative thoughts. Some of them are so bad, you'd never voice them aloud even if absolutely enraged. But meditation can help you control your thoughts much better, and thus promote positive thoughts over these negative voices we see so much of every day.


7.)  Meditation improves concentration.

You're sitting in absolute quiet. You are focusing on one piece of your body or mind and everything else ceases to exist. If your mind wanders, you gently guide it back to the matter at hand without judgment or anger.

This is the very definition of the term 'concentration'. If you have trouble concentrating (and who doesn't in our modern world), then meditation may be the solution for you. And we all know that I prescribe to the belief that focus is one of the key factors to a successful life.

8.) Meditation makes you less bothered by the little things.

Remember yesterday's post? Well, meditation encourages you to look at the big picture more, without becoming overly concerned with the small details. Messing up and eating a small piece of cake on a rare occasion doesn't hurt your overall health -- consistent choices are what influences your health. So, if you are eating that cake every day, chances are you're hurting the overall picture. But an occasional slip-up?

That barely affects the big picture and meditation helps you see that. Connections begin to make more and more sense in your mind. And as I believe the ability to see the big picture and how it all connects is the greatest gift mankind has, I think it's well-worth encouraging!

9.) Meditation can improve your ability to connect with other people.

While meditation can seem like the ultimate form of self-absorption, at least one kind of meditation can improve your compassion (and thus your connection) with other people. It's known as loving-kindness meditation.

And who doesn't need a good boost to their social life?

10.) Meditation helps you feel more grounded.

Meditation brings you into the moment of now. It's a very different feeling, especially if you're like me and constantly dreaming of a possible future. Bringing you more into this moment right here is an excellent way to help you get more done, as you can't act in any other moment but right now.


I encourage everyone to meditate for at least 10 minutes every day. It's a great way to get your life and mind under control, and to learn more about yourself than you ever realized was available to know. If you're interested, check out Headspace or Calm.com. They can get you started towards a more relaxing and fulfilling life.

That's what they've done for me!

Daily Stats:

 

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today.
2. Wrote in my journal, stayed on budget, and wrote a poem today.
3. Posted on my blog.
4. Made my bed and did a load of dishes.
5. Started my diet change and bought groceries for my next week.
6. Didn't cook anything yet (got home from work with my groceries at midnight).

The Side Effect

I've been doing a lot of soul-searching during my meditation time lately, and have discovered quite a few interesting things about myself. Not the least of which is that I have a lot of negative, self-hating thoughts that I don't allow to become conscious words in my mind, but they still impact me and my sense of self-worth every day.

But another interesting conclusion came to me the other day. Since I've begun meditating, I find that I'm less and less concerned with whether other people think I'm good enough, and more and more concerned with whether or not I think I'm good enough.

And that is a huge deal for me.

I have suffered from poor boundaries all my life. Other people's opinions and feelings have always seemed to matter more than my own. But now, I find my own thoughts are gaining in power inside my own mind, becoming more important than the thoughts of others.

In other words, I'm becoming more self-confident. Which is INCREDIBLE!!!

This side effect of meditation alone makes all the time I spend doing it worth while. To be honest, I think this is benefiting me more than therapy ever did! I feel fantastic almost all the time. I feel more peaceful, more in control over my own body and mind, and more aware of the world around me. It's truly opened up my life to me.

If it worked for me, I don't see why it wouldn't work for you. I recommend that you skip the C, and sign up for meditation today. The side effects are worth it!

Daily Stats:

 

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today.
2.  Wrote in my journal, stayed on budget, and wrote a poem today.
3. Posted on my blog.
4. Made my bed. 

10 Reasons to Exercise

We all know we should exercise. But why should we exercise? Knowing that, and keeping it in mind each day when it's time to sweat through your clothes, makes you that much more likely to do it.

1.) Exercise combats health conditions and diseases.

If there was a pill we could take that could magically reduce our risk of heart disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, high cholesterol, cardiovascular diseases, stroke, metabolic syndrome, depression, certain types of cancers, arthritis, and falls, we'd all take it, right? Well, that pill exists. It just isn't a pill. All it takes is a little exercise each day to prevent major health conditions that could permanently alter your world as you know it.

Isn't that worth a little sweat and burn?

2.) Exercise improves mood.

Exercise sends off all those nice endorphins in the brain, making you feel good. Plus, regular exercise has been shown to improve your self-image and confidence.

Having troubles with self-esteem? Maybe you should just take a walk...every day for a month. See how you feel.

3.) Exercise boosts energy.

This one is a deal-breaker for me. I have struggled with meeting goals and making things happen in my life for years. Exercise has helped me push through on my goals and start making things happen in my life.

It's really no mystery. Regular physical activity delivers oxygen and nutrients to your tissues and helps your cardiovascular system work more efficiently. If your heart and lungs work more efficiently, you're going to have more energy for the other activities in your day.

4.) Exercise promotes better sleep.

As long as you don't exercise too close to sleep, you'll find that you'll fall asleep faster and sleep deeper if you exercise often. And of course, the more deep sleep you get, the more energy you'll have the next day.

Deeper sleep has also been shown to combat health problems. Want better health overall? Exercise is the magic pill!

You just have to take it.

5.) Exercise controls weight.

Well, most of us know that. But have you ever REALLY thought about it? Each day, you ingest copious amounts of fat, cholesterol, carbohydrates, as well as a host of other chemical compounds. And you have to do that, just to survive. But what happens if you do nothing to offset this intake? If you take in more than you work off, you're going to gain weight until you're the size of a whale.

Or just dead.

But regular exercise means that you're subtracting as much (or more) as you're adding in. It's simple math. If you want to change your size, you have to make the numbers work in your favor. Exercise is the only reasonable means you have of subtracting more than you take in. There is no other way (diet is reducing the amount you add; but it doesn't really subtract anything).

6.) Exercise makes you smarter.

Or, at least, it makes you more capable of applying your intelligence. Studies have shown people who exercise are more able to focus, are faster at reacting to problems, have better memories, and better cognitive function in general. 

So, exercise really is a no-brainer.

7.) Exercise reduces stress.

Had a hard day at work? Try a quick run. A little exercise can help you unwind from that confrontation you had with a coworker or the mean customer you faced today.

And everyone knows that stress today is killing us. The more you reduce your stress, the better you're going to feel.

8.) Exercise improves your sex life.

Well, of course. Sex is a physical effort in and of itself. So improving your, erm, performance will improve your sex life. Not to mention, self-esteem and confidence are great at improving anyone's sex life, and we've already mentioned how exercise improves you there!

But there's more to it than that. According to MayoClinic.com, regular exercise leads to enhanced arousal in women. And men who exercise are less likely to have problems like erectile dysfunction. (Check out the article here) 

9.) Exercise keeps your bones strong.

As you get older, osteoporosis is a real danger. You could lose the ability to run, walk, even stand! But with a little exercise each day, you could keep all of that from happening, increasing your chances of independence into your old age.

And how many of us actually want to live in a retirement home if we can help it?

10.) Exercise is actually fun!

It's true! Exercise can be a source of enjoyment in and of itself. And not just for health nuts (no offense). So-called "normal" people can enjoy exercise, too. 

The key is finding an exercise you actually like doing. Swimming, kayaking, skiing, there are a lot of options out there. And anything that gets you moving is worth it. Heck, they even have Wii games that get you going, if you don't want to experience the real thing. Just find something that fits your likes and dislikes, and get going! You might be surprised by how much you like it (I certainly have been).


Does anyone else have any other reasons to exercise? What motivators have you found that work for you?

Daily Stats:

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today.
2. Wrote in my journal, stayed on budget, and wrote a poem today.
3. Posted on blog.
4. Made bed, picked up in my room, and organized my desk.

The Weak Points

Some of you out there may have noticed something about every single one of my blog posts: I finish them with a listing of my daily stats of what I did to reach my goals that day. This is a way for me to stay accountable for my actions. No, I don't lie on those stats to impress anyone; that would be missing the whole point. This is my personal improvement exercise. To lie would only be cheating myself of any improvement I could reap from it.

If you have been reading, you might have noticed that I have a few consistent weak points. There are two of the four goals that I find the most difficult to implement in my life. And neither of them have come as a shock to me.

Budgeting and cleaning are not things I enjoy. I doubt many of you reading this enjoy them, either. But I'm trying to face them, head on, to improve my life.

I'm still quite weak at those goals, though. I don't always stay on budget, I don't plan my budget as in-depth as I really should, I don't clean as much as I need to, and I don't make major cleaning projects the priority on my days off work as I planned. These are my weak points. These are the areas of my change plan that need the most work.

Studies have shown that people who spend most of their time in practice working on their weak points, show more improvement overall than those who spend a more balanced time dedicated to everything. Why? Because focus really does make a difference. All those multi-tasking benefits we've heard of? All lies.

 My main focus of late has been on budgeting. Mostly because I believe if I can rein in my spending habits, I can eventually afford some of the more expensive goals I have planned for later. After I get that under some control, I'm going to tackle my cleaning and organizational habits.

So, if anyone out there is wondering why I'm not moving on to goals 5 and 6 yet, this is why. Until I've improved in the budgeting and cleaning spheres, adding new goals will be left on hold. That's just common sense.

Daily Stats:

 

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on writing this morning. Too sick to exercise and stretch tonight (strep), so I only meditated and worked on my writing.
2. Wrote in journal, planned budget for my next 2 weeks, and wrote a poem.
3. Posted on blog.
4. Absolutely no cleaning done.

Writing Down Your Troubles

Why did I make writing in a journal one of my goals? Well, that's simple. Because I'm a writer. And because talking myself through this change will make the process SO much easier, in the long run.

Not to mention, there is something so freeing in writing in a journal. It doesn't matter what you say, how you say it, or even why. It's your journal; you choose who reads it. And it's your space to just be yourself. Admit to your weaknesses. Describe your dark inner thoughts. Explore your flaws.

Only by facing what is wrong with you, deep inside, can you hope to change it. It won't go away on its own. You can't wish it away. It's there, and it haunts every day of your life.

And it will only get worse if you never deal with it.

A journal is truly the perfect place to work through some of that. Some might recommend therapy (and you may need that, too), but a journal won't charge you forty bucks an hour just to talk!

Just look at me! Every word I've written inside my journal has brought me strength in my change. It's part of the reason I've made it this far. Here's a few links to give you some ideas on why I recommend journaling so strongly:

The Health Benefits of Journaling

10 Reasons to Keep a Journal

Still not convinced? Well, think on this: In a journal, you can explore yourself, both good and bad, without fear of judgment or bias. It's just a page in a notebook. It isn't going to hate you or gossip about you. Instead, it will soak your words into its very soul, the truest form of listening you can ever imagine.

If you don't have a journal already, I recommend getting one. It's so simple to begin. All you have to do is write.

Daily Stats:

1. Exercise, stretched, meditated, and worked on writing twice today.
2. Wrote in my journal, stayed on budget, and wrote a poem today.
3. Posted on blog.
4. Made my bed.

 

Pursuing Passion

I'm pretty lucky. I've known what my passion was most of my life. Sure, I've wanted to learn everything else and then some, but there is one thing I've never been able to stop myself from doing:

Writing.

Creating worlds, characters, and stories has fascinated me since I was a very little girl. I've pretty much known I wanted to be a writer since I was 5 years old, in fact. And my passion for it has only grown with time. Today, I can say without any doubt, writing is the one thing I wish to do every day for the rest of my life. 

To be honest, all the rest of my life-changing goals are centered around this one. I want to be an author, published and known. Maybe even famous. (If I'm completely honest, I really want to be famous. To know that that many people have read my stories, walked in my worlds? That would be a dream come true for me.) But my life can't be completely about writing. I want a few other projects in my life someday, such as gardening and beekeeping. But writing is the main focus I want in my life.

If someone was to someday write a sentence summarizing my life, this is what I want it to say:

She was an incredible writer, inviting people around the world to walk inside her worlds and meet her imaginary friends, sharing in the beauty and friendship themselves.

I've found that pursuing this passion of mine has redefined my life in some way I can't articulate (which is a funny thing for a writer to say). I feel happier. More fulfilled. Less burned out by life and pain. More tolerant. Just better.

Maybe that's the meditation. Or exercise. Or the positive thinking. But, then, I only started those things because I wanted to benefit my writing, in essence, enrich my passion. And it has. Beyond my wildest dreams.

What's your passion? How much of your day do you spend pursuing it? I'm sure you don't have the time in this busy world of ours. Nor the money. Nor the skills. Well, neither do I. That's why I'm doing this. So I can acquire those things and pursue my passion for the rest of my life. Is there a way you can bring more passion into your life?

Think on it. Because if this experience is teaching me anything, it's this: Passion can truly change your life, pushing you to do things you never thought possible. Its power is as unending as its rewards...

If you have the guts to pursue it.

Daily Stats:

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today.
2. Wrote in my journal, stayed on budget, and wrote a poem today.
3. Posted on my blog.
4. Made my bed and picked up in room.

Remembering Calm

Sit still. Think of your body in this moment. What does it feel like? Does it ache? Is it tense? Do you feel the chair resting against your back? Or the bed against your belly?

That is now. That is this moment. That is the present and nothing else.
 
There is a certain power in living in just this moment, without envisioning a dream future (or a nightmare one, if you're a pessimist) or reliving the mistakes or triumphs of the past. It gives you focus, a skill you may have noticed that I enthusiastically endorse learning.

More than that, meditation gives you a touch stone in your day-to-day life. With just a change in your breathing, or a slight touch of your fingers, you're reminded of a moment of peace in times of great stress.

What do I mean when I say this? Well, think about it. How many times in your life have you faced a scary prospect, or become so angry you're about to blow a gasket, and someone has told you to just take a deep breath and calm down? Like it's that easy. As simple as taking a deep breath and making yourself calm down when you're feeling such tempestuous emotions!

It isn't that easy. Emotions rule our day-to-day life more than we even realize. And creating calm and relaxing your muscles in the face of strong emotion is almost impossible, just as facing a large crowd to give a speech can be almost impossible (public speaking is the number one fear of humans worldwide, according to most studies; death comes second in most people's estimations).

But what if you prepare beforehand? Practice your speech by yourself over and over until you know it by heart. And then take it to your family and friends to practice it in front of them. Is it as impossible then?

Not really. It's still pretty hard, but each preparation makes the fear lessen a little more. And instead of creating your speech on the spur of the moment, with the crowd staring you down and your heart speeding too fast to be measured, you have a pre-written speech ready to be recited from memory. It's always easier to remember something you already know than to craft it from nothing in the face of heavy emotion.

The same is true about relaxation and calm. It's hard to pull those feelings up on command, like a rabbit from a magician's hat. But what if you practiced every single day? What if you took the time to feel that feeling every morning before you went to work or faced your family? Would remembering that feeling, preparing for the stressful moments of life when you'd need that calm most of all, make a difference when facing that moment of truth?

Yes. It's still pretty hard, but the practice makes it a little easier to do. Instead of creating calm and relaxation from nothing, you merely remember what it felt like when you meditated. Remember your muscles relaxing. Remember your emotions falling to the back of your mind and your body becoming your focus. Remember how it felt to be calm.

And then you won't have to remember. Because you're feeling it right now.

If you wish to explore your own calm, why not try a simple site like calm.com? It never mentions meditation, you can choose whatever nature background noise you wish to hear, and it's a great beginner's source for learning to be calm. Hope it helps you as much as it has me!

Daily Stats:

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today.
2. Wrote in my journal, stayed on budget, and wrote a poem today.
3. Posted on my blog.
4. Picked up a little in my room.

Meet The Woman I Want To Be

I want to be a calm, happy, intelligent woman who writes. I want to feel good about myself and my life. I want to be happy with my vocation, happy with my hobbies, and happy with my choices. And I want to be healthy and motivated, able to do anything and everything I set my mind to.

And I want to become that person, that ideal, by the age of 30.

Here's a more detailed, vivid picture of who I want to be by the time I'm 30:

• A published writer.
• A healthy woman NOT on medication for diabetes, heart disease, etc.
• In a stable, enjoyable vocation.
• Taking regular classes in different subjects, just for the sake of learning.
• A seasoned traveler who's been to Africa, South America, India, and toured Europe.
• Living a green, self-sufficient lifestyle.
• Debt free.
• HAPPY!

I do not want to be any of these things when I'm 30 years old:

• Still working at Walmart.
• A procrastinator.
• A person with a list of nothing but unfinished projects.
• Still not green or self-sufficient.
• Knee deep in debt.
• Stuck in the same dead-end cycle of life.

 It's a tall order to fill in just 7 years. But I can do it, if I just take it one day, one step, at a time. Because that's who I want to be someday.

And I will be her. That transformation has already begun. If I never give up, never give in to self-doubt or immediate gratification, then that person is who I will be.

That's why I'm doing this. That's why I'm here.

Daily Stats:

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today.
2. Wrote in my journal and stayed on budget.
3. Posted another post on my blog.
4. Picked up in room, did laundry, and did a load of dishes.

Change Anything

In my last post, I talked about focus. Well, this post is all about our means of directing your focus. The best part? The same methods used against you to alter your focus to immediate gratification may be used to direct your attention towards the ultimate goal you truly want to attain in your life.

I actually discovered them in the book entitled Change Anything, by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, David Maxfield, Ron McMillan, and Al Switzler.

According to this book, there are six sources of motivation (which I believe is more about focus than anything) and they are: personal motivation, personal ability, social motivation, social ability, structural motivation, and structural ability.

What do these mean? Well, I'll walk you through them one by one, and tell you how I'm using each one of these motivating factors in my life.

The first is personal motivation. You have to connect with the overall goal in your crucial moments (that is, when you're about to give into temptation) and focus on what you want for your future rather than what you want right now. I implement this motivating factor with abstract thinking. I keep my goal and ultimate desire (to be a healthy, happy, and successful writer someday) in the forefront of my mind as much as I possibly can. Then, it's easy to pull up to the front of my mind when I want to remember not to be tempted.

I also make it more specific. I want to be a prolific, self-employed writer who doesn't have to rely on secular work to pay the bills. I want to be self-sufficient, always learning, and have finished my main project's books by the age of 30. Keeping this vision vivid gives me more to draw from when I'm tempted to stray.

The second is personal ability. This refers to the skills you need to tackle the task at hand. Chances are your life before now hasn't prepared you for the new life you wish to take on (mine certainly hasn't). So, you must learn new skills to pull from and use to reach your goal.

I'm learning all kinds of new skills to help me with my goals. Exercise, meditation, organization, budgeting. The list goes on and on. The important factor is that you learn them so that you have a bigger chance of success at whatever you're working towards.

The third is social motivation. We are who we hang out with. Our mothers told us this when we were kids, but we refused to believe her. But it's true! What you see as the norm (as in, who you associate with) is what you view as the desired goal for yourself. So, if you hang out with people who complain a lot, you'll find that you do, too.

You'll also find the reverse is true. If you're around positive, peppy people, you'll feel more positive and happy.

The fourth is social ability. This means that change is a difficult thing to do on one's own. Humans are social animals and we like to do things in a group. If you have support, encouragement, and guidance from those around you, you're far more likely to succeed.

I'm implementing the third and the fourth of these motivators by talking with my existing friends about my changes and starting this blog in hopes of meeting those with similar goals.

The fifth is structural motivation. If you link short-term rewards and punishments to your changes, you'll be far more likely to succeed. I implemented this by allowing myself to get that game I've been wanting only after I had kept to my routine for half a month. I also don't allow myself to eat out at a higher priced restaurant until I've managed to keep below budget the rest of the week.

The sixth and final motivator on the list is structural ability. This has more to do with your environment. What are the things in your life influencing you to do? If you have a tv at the center of your room with all the surrounding materials based upon it, you're not going to get much else but watching tv done. However, studies have shown that the closer your treadmill is to your television set, the more exercising you'll get done.

I implemented this motivator by organizing my room and, most importantly, straightening my desk so that my writing has plenty of space to be laid out there. It makes it much more inviting and tempting to sit down and get to work. I also cleared out my floor so that I had plenty of room to work out there.

If you'd like to see the scientific studies the researchers did that lead them to these conclusions, check out this book at amazon.com or your local library.

Daily Stats:

 

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today.
2. Wrote in my journal and did NOT stay on budget again today.
3. Posted on my blog.
4.  Picked up in my room a little.

Just Fo...Ooo, Shiny Object!

Whatever your focus, that is your life.

If you focus on negative things, your life will be negative. You focus on positive things, your life will be positive. We've all heard this. But that's not specific enough to truly alter your thinking, is it?

Think about your day. Mine is constantly filled with temptations that alter my focus. I walk into work (at Walmart) with my focus pumped up to save money and not diverge from my budget. But then I see that chocolate cake, and my mouth starts to water and I imagine myself eating it. And voila, my focus has shifted from my budget and future savings to the immediate gratification of blowing that budget for that tasty cake.

9 times out of 10, I buy the cake.

Guess what my life has been filled with? Constant allowances and excuses as to why it's okay to give into the immediate gratification rather than struggle and strive for my overall goals and lifetime dreams.

But I don't want that anymore. I want to live my dreams. I want to achieve my goals. And I want to beat my own desires so that I can achieve those things. For my own good, of course.

In summary, if you keep your focus on the big picture (what you want for your life overall) you will live a life that perpetuates that ideal. But if you allow temptations to shift your focus to immediate gratification (the thing you want right now) and don't immediately force yourself back on track, well, you will live a life that is the exact opposite of that ideal.

How do you keep your focus? I've discussed how I'm doing it in previous posts, but we'll go even deeper in how focus works in my next post all about Change Anything, a book by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, David Maxfield, Ron McMillan, and Al Switzler.

Daily stats:

1. Exercised, stretched, meditated, and worked on my writing twice today.
2. Wrote in my journal and failed to keep my budget, but planned how to make up for that.
3. Created and posted a blog post.
4. Picked up in room and den (but not much).